ITEM!

In the spirit of the “vacation” I took last week, I’m going to do a little tidying up in this post, hitting a lot of points with no real theme.

DG and I took Thursday and Friday off last week for a little mini-vacation. I’ve got vacation days that expire at the end of June and don’t roll over, so I thought I’d burn a few during the college’s spring break. And DG just wanted to get out of the lab for a while. We spent most of it cleaning the apartment, watching the snow, and playing on the Wii.

Most of the games we’ve played on the Wii thus far have been old ones—specifically Super Mario Bros., The Legend of Zelda, and Donkey Kong Country. All good games, though I have to admit to being frustrated by SMB. I beat Super Mario Bros. 2 and 3 as a kid, but I was never able to beat the first one. That eighth level was just too hard, and it was difficult to get extra lives in that game. I think my inability to beat SMB may be responsible for my general lack of perseverance in life. All my failures are heaped at the foot your toadstool, Mario, you and your twitchy controls on that first game.
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Power Up

Like many New Englanders, DG and I have been impoverished by incredibly high heating bills. We have electric heat, so that gets wrapped into our electric bill. Given the high bills we’ve had the last two months, DG suggested that perhaps the new Xbox 360 was eating up a lot of power.

As I was both curious about that myself—and feeling defensive of my beloved console—I decided to do a little digging online. First up was this article, which showed that, during game use, the 360 eats up an impressive amount of power, while our Wii sips lightly at the electric tap (with the commensurate dip in graphics complexity):

Console graph

The whole article is interesting and informative, and sheds light on something I’d never really thought about before.

Of course, the real question is how this translates into higher digits on my electric bill. As it turns out, if I were to leave my Xbox 360 on all the time, the cost would be about $20 a year according to this article, whose writer based the numbers on what NStar was charging him in the Boston surburbs. Given that we live in Brighton, that’s probably about dead-on for us. $20 spread over the course of the year isn’t bad at all, and it definitely isn’t accounting for our massively high energy bills, particularly given the fact that I don’t leave my 360 on (and have also stopped leaving my PC on during the day).

So apparently the high bills are mostly heating costs. Still, it’s nice to be aware of this. The seventh generation consoles represent a large jump in energy usage, since the most power-hungry sixth-generation console (the original Xbox) cost only $8 a year. And given the size of the 360’s massive power brick, and the fact that it vents enough heat to warm our study, I can’t say I’m surprised.

Wormy fate

I downloaded Worms for the Xbox Live Arcade this morning. I’ve been a Worms fan since the very first version of the game back in the early ’90s (though I never tried the 3D versions, as I think that’s just not the right format for the property).

While the game is as good as ever, I do have a couple of beefs. First, the game was designed for HD, and like Dead Rising, a lot of the text (and even some of the graphics) look a little small and blurry on my non-HD TV. Alien Hominid is HD as well, but it looks fine to me, so I don’t know what the deal is. The only difference I can think of is that AH’s graphics are larger, and it doesn’t have any actual “type” text (just big cartoony text), which may make the difference.

My other beef is with the controls. Alien Hominid maps the “shoot” button on X and the “jump” button on A. Worms maps them exactly opposite. This has cost me several wormy lives today; as brave Commander Corndog turned to fire his bazooka upon a foe, he instead found himself leaping to a watery grave.

Worms doesn’t offer the ability to edit the controls, which means I’ve got to teach my brain to distinguish both control sets. Unfortunately, both games make extensive use of those two functions.

But it gave me a thought: why can’t Microsoft offer the ability to remap the controls of any game? You can already add custom soundtracks to any game. As long as all you’re doing is swapping among the same number of buttons, there’s no reason not to make this an option.

Back Inaction

So last week, I decided to play at pretending to be a Real Man™ and attempted to replace my nine-year-old car’s battery. You may recall my car’s infamous breakdown last summer. Well, the battery managed to survive that incident (despite one mechanic’s assurances that he would need me to buy an expensive new battery) only to die two weeks ago when I accidentally left the overhead light on during the coldest weekend ever. I’m pretty sure I could have jumped the car back to life, but given how much it had been through recently I thought it best to spend the fifty bucks to replace the battery.

I should add that I had to quite literally chisel my car’s right tires out of the ice that had enclosed them. I used the claw end of a hammer and the process took nearly an hour, at the end of which my hands had started to turn purple from frostbite (true!).
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Xbox Live Arcade

I was really excited to get an Xbox 360 back in December. Thinking back, though, I can’t remember exactly why I decided I wanted a new videogame system. I’m not sure which games I was looking forward to, other than, obviously, Halo 3.

Xbox Live Arcade

I found out about Gears of War and that became the reason I was getting a 360. I played GoW for about a month straight, but I don’t think I’ve played it in almost a week. I’ve beaten the campaign on three difficulty levels and played through the entire game as the second player in co-op, so there are really no more worlds to conquer there (and personally, I don’t find either the gameplay or the campaign quite as entertaining as the Halo series—I’m currently replaying Halo for the second time in two months, having played through Halo 2 in the interim). However, Microsoft has a few interesting aces up its sleeve when it comes to keeping me playing between big releases like Gears of War and Halo 3.
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Action!

My life, as of late, has consisted primarily of working, playing videogames, and…well, reading on occasion, though I just had to give up the book I was reading because the writing wasn’t very good. It was the second time I’d tried this writer. The first time it was one of his early novels, so I thought I’d give him another shot, but no joy; again, the awkward, stilted writing confounded me. I won’t name the author in the incredibly unlikely event that I ever make it in the industry, but I doubt I’ll be trying him again anytime soon.

I did recently read a novel that I enjoyed immensely: Armor by John Steakley. It’s loosely based on Heinlein’s Starship Troopers, with the same set-up (humanity is in an intergalactic war with a race of spacefaring giant insects, and the plot battles are fought with soldiers wearing powered armor).
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Top Ten Cartoons of All Time…EVER.

Since my Saturday morning cartoons post proved so popular, I decided to go ahead and compile a list of my top ten cartoons of all time. This list is unrestrained by timeslot or, I should mention, relative quality. I make no claim as to this list representing what I think are the best cartoons ever made. That list would be quite different. Today’s list is about the cartoons that have made a significant impact on me or my life at some point.

Anyone who knows me at all no doubt can guess #1 right now, but we’re going to start at number ten.
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The Vending Machines are Coming

I work at a small art college. Recently, the college installed what has to be the most complicated vending machine ever made.

Vending machines used to be simple: you pays your money and you gets your chocolate bar. Nowadays you usually just push a button, though there was a time you had to pull a lever or turn a crank or do something that actually requires a little bit of manual labor, much like those poor saps who don’t have power windows in their car.

But no vending machine in compares to the terrifying device now squatting in the student lounge.
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Gaming’s Greatest Guns

I’ve got to agree with most of the choices in this article, “Gaming’s Greatest Guns”. I’ve played most of those games and the choices are dead-on, especially DOOM II‘s double-barreled shotgun, Duke Nukem 3D‘s shrink-ray, Halo‘s pistol and Perfect Dark‘s laptop gun. (Though, from what I understand, the omission of Half-Life 2‘s Gravity Gun is fairly egregious.)

Some of the commenters on the article suggest the Lancer from Gears of Wars should be included as well. Personally I disagree—there’s nothing particularly innovative or interesting about the weapon, except that it’s a machine gun with a chainsaw on it. We’ve had chainsaws and we’ve had machine guns in FPS games before. The Torque Bow is a bit more interesting, but I don’t really see how it’s significantly different from a missile launcher (except that it takes longer to fire, can’t heat-seek, and has a delay before it explodes).

Ultimately, I don’t think any of Gears of Wars‘s weapons were particularly ground-breaking in any way (or even overpowered), so I wouldn’t have included them on the list.

On a related note, it looks like the much-loved original Halo pistol is back for Halo 3—in looks, at least (the video is a leak and will probably be taken down by the time you click).

Two years and counting

Since the Saturday morning cartoon post proved so popular, I’ll soon put up a Top Ten Cartoons of All Time post. I’m just trying to decide whether to do it in one big post or as ten separate posts.

Today marks the two-year anniversary of the current incarnation of Biggerboat. Two years ago I wrote my first post, “paramental”, discussing a short story that I never actually finished (surprise surprise). Things were different back then. The Sox were World Series champions. The Patriots were about to win the Super Bowl the very next day. And the domestication of the dog continued unabated.
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